Another Day of Scheming and Day Dreaming

Occasionally someone reads the IOL newsletter and gratefully commends
us for our contribution to their physical fitness pursuits. Thank you
for the information and encouragement, they say. Among the
appreciative are the well-tuned, keen-eyed literary critics who
comment on my effusive writing style, citing my generous use of
adjectives, adverbs and metaphors and fortified clichés.

The words I toss together are simple attempts to gain your attention
and point you in a sound and agreeable direction in your
muscle-building journey. Like well-placed signs on roadways warning of
bumps, sharp curves and slippery slopes, I offer advisory cautions and
guides.

The subject matter is less prolific than my choice of adjectives and
words ending in ly, say my counseling readership. I should think of
something worthy to say, they continue, perhaps between sets at the
gym or while ingesting cans of tuna and water. Cute!

I am a servant, I am obliging, I am creative, I am positive. I'm real.
Thus, the messages in the future IOL rags will uncover real, hidden
and, till now, never before exposed secrets. Developing topics
include:

1) Building lean and mighty muscle

2) Losing unsightly body fat

3) Growing thick, luxurious scalp hair

4) Earning big bucks restoring discarded gym bags, sneakers and wraps

5) Recycling precious energy from your stationary bike

6) Wining friends and influencing people while living in a fast yet
stagnant world where wars rage and drugs kill and predators feast and
corruption rules and values disintegrate and leadership deteriorates
and people rebel and precious nature recedes and the only good
investments in today's economy is iron and Bomber Blend.

You asked for it.

Hold on for a sec, the phone's ringing...

Hello... Hi, Arnold... You're asking me to meet you for a quick
workout... You bet, how about the same time, same place... sure, we'll
work arms and gut like we used to... I know, some things never change,
love the past... Let's superset the basics and depend on our focus,
our internal strength and our passion to guide us as we squeeze the
most out of each incredible movement... Yup, steady, hard-working and
sure -- lighthearted, yet soulful... Right, we'll blast it... Right,
we'll bomb it... Right, you're incredible. See ya there... Right,
bodybuilding is fantastic... See ya.

Wow! That was a blast from the past. Gosh, I'm awash in memories.

One of the more outstanding reminders surfacing during that short, yet
scintillating conversation with Arnold was the intense and immersed
style of training we shared in the past. I don't believe such training
exists anymore, surely not in surplus. And the reasons why are
multiple.

Consider for a sec the handy-dandy enhancers from the underground,
proliferation of current training methodologies cautioning against any
hint of volumous training, the obvious increase in techno-based
physical apathy and languor, the introduction and takeover of sparkly,
non-inspiring, look-at-me gym atmospheres, the co-incidental loss of
gyms that matter, and the general chaos of minds of men and women, and
boys and girls today. Morals and personal responsibility ain't so good
either.

Arnold is one of a kind, strong, sincere and vigorous. Folks around
here call him Arnie and are grateful for the good work he does. He's
attentive to detail, he's fair and he's not against getting his hands
dirty to repair a mess. He owns ABC, the Auto Body Center on High
Street near Dunkin Donuts... drives a restored '69 Pontiac GTO muscle
car with loud pipes. We work out when we have time, which reminds me
of my current stream of conscious... um... dribble of delusion.

Are we becoming busier, yet less active texting techno-headed
scatterbrains developing unbelievable cellular gadgetry while
developing unbelievable limitations to physical exertion, endurance
and pain? Absolutely, I say, with the exception of a courageous band
of warriors known as bombers, who regularly spread wide their wings
and raise their spirits of strength and health.

Periodically I'm compelled by the great Force of Iron to remind us of
mankind's unnatural descent and impending vulnerability. Kinda like
pointing out ones fly is open or blouse is unbuttoned or mouth is
drooling or nose is dripping or clock is ticking and it's getting
late. Fix it if you care -- you certainly can -- before it's too late.

Our workouts are our first and last stand against the deterioration of
our bodies, the wiles of the world and the destruction of the same.
They are also fun and exciting, fulfilling and lovable. And they work
most effectively when accompanied by smart eating practices.

Secrets, concealed facts and obscure truths flow from my long-sealed
lips like pouring rain. You're all wet, Draper.

Last week obesity was the headliner. This week (finally), gaining lean
muscular weight is the focus of our conversation. Oh, my! Time flies
when you're babbling. I'm thus compelled to dash off a sally of
little-known weight-gain proposals (low-tech facts, freeform ideas,
unstructured notions and educated guesses) that work for most people.
They've worked for me for over 50 years.

Eat better, train harder, be tougher, think surer and rest morer.

Of course, there's always the slightly expanded version:

1) Late flash! Gaining lean muscle weight is a slow process. Lots of
good food, hard training, guts and persistence required. One must not
pursue weight gain randomly or surrender to the tediousness of the
process. Backward steps are too hard to recover. Never give up.

2) Seeking lean muscle only is a frustrating mission as few -- I've
known three or four -- are blessed with the superior metabolism and
genetic blueprint. And waiting for lean muscle to grow is like
watching a pot of water, it never boils.

3) Though lean muscle mass is the desired goal, gaining muscle mass,
or bulk, a solid composition of muscle and essential adipose tissue,
is the more common achievement of size-conscious musclebuilders.

4) Well distributed bulk is appealing, useful and rewarding for most
lifters with long-term goals and a tolerance for temporary
bodybuilding smoothness. Proper bulk provides strength and energy to
overload the muscles during a workout (hypertrophy) and plenty of
tissue building resources for muscle development.

5) Guess what... The lifter must eat more and better meals -- a
balance of complete protein, nutrient-dense carbs and non-greasy fat
meals. Eat smaller portions more frequently throughout the day without
failure for better nutrient absorption, more consistent
tissue-building provisions and less system overload. Break out the
Tupperware and embrace the routine of preparing meals for the road.
Missed meals are backward steps.

6) Drink lots of water. I repeat -- water, water and water and no soda
pop. Soda is a crime, water is divine. While on the subject, no junk,
no garbage, no kidding.

7) Most serious muscle builders drink milk, eat dairy, consume eggs
and include red meat in their diet. There's more: A quality protein
powder as a dietary supplement and meal fortifier is a most effective
and convenient weight gain tool. I vow under oath, Bomber Blend is the
best.

8) Remember: Fresh fruit and salads are invaluable for weight gain,
health and system vitality. EFAs from olive oil, flaxseed and fish add
health to the body and calories to your musclebuilding diet. I
periodically forget to include the above and suspect you do, too.
Living foods and essential fats are great warriors and supportive
cheerleaders. Lock and load! Go, muscles, go!

9) Drugs and chemical enhancers are out of the picture. They work
hastily to supply greedy needs, but so do petty theft and grand
larceny. Getting something for nothing is for nobody and no one. Once
you open the outhouse door, it's tough to shut. Stinky, too.

10) Workout sessions, along with meal regularity, take center stage.
Know yourself, know your training and persistently bomb it without
overtraining and without failing. Common sense, instinct, practice,
trial and error, observation and time teach... guide. Missed workouts
are backward steps.

Limit your aerobic schedule to three 15-minute blasts a week and think
training intensity. I have an acquaintance who doesn't do any aerobic
activity, convinced it interferes with his mass gains and muscle
retention. He adds the conserved time and energy to his regimen of
intense weight training, believing his thus-amped training is
sufficient for cardiovascular health. Hmm...

11) Rest and relaxation are as important as drive and vitality to
developing lean muscle. Snooze good, rest and de-stress regularly, and
meditate on building a strong body and mind and soul when musing.

12) Remember the words of one of the greatest lifters in the world,
Sir Winston Churchill, "Never give up. Never give up. Never! Never!
Never!"

The secrets are revealed, the buried treasures uncovered, the gems of
truth are fixed in settings of gold. Light replaces darkness.

Peculiar thing about musclebuilding secrets, there aren't any.

When you're a bomber, nothing is new. The only thing remaining is hard
work, love, hope and faith.

Throttle forward, steady as she goes, soar... DD

Source: davedraper.com