Hi.

Its been a while since I last been on here, but I've been going through a hell of a tough time lately, I've been diagnosed with sever depression and anxiety
To be frank I'm mainly down since I am unhappy with myself such as my own looks and personality. If I looked better I would probably feel better inside aswell.

I quit Uninversity the other week since that was making me even worse, but now I got a lot of time on my own at home lately I just feel even more depressed. So I got things together and managed to pass several tests to be eligible to be a police officer, I have to pass a medical then I should start training for it next month

At the age of 6 years old I began to gain weight and at the age of 14 i weighed 14 stone!!!! I was fatttt!

However I got a benine tumour on my left leg at 16 and because of that and the infections it caused I lost all my excess fat since I couldn't eat properly. From 17 onwards I realised I felt inadequate and small and so wanted to get huge like my idol Arnold and so I started training from then on naturally to be like him.

However I noticed a lot of my body is definately more muscled and defined, but because I was so fat when I was young, the lacking areas of my body are unresponsive to my training simply because I have overstrecthed them when I put on so much weight, that the elasticity is no more e.g my stomach and face. I have no idea what to do and sometimes I feel the more I train, the more I need to train since I am not what I want to be yet, its almost as if I'm training to feed my insecurties rather than to be healthier.

I have no idea what to do, all I know is if I don't look better then I won't feel better. I'm taking anti-depressants but coming off them in the next week and I don't want to start feeling bad again and make drastcic decisions that I could easily solve by other means. I don't know whether I just need to get better diets, have excess skin removal or even try certain steroids to see if my unresponsive areas can be reshaped.

I want to look great, but I need to look great for the right reasonss, rather than just to impress other people or to scare them. But I am certain places like my stomach aern't responding simply because the muscle walls are too streched. My body fat % is very low, I even went onto the body opus diet and atkins diet, and all my body got cut except for my stomach which just looked saggy with the excess skin.

Is there any advice I can get? Am I just going through what other young bodybuilders go through when they get obsessed with bodybuilding? Any help you lot can give I so would be greatful for because I don't feel like anyone else I know can help me or understand me from a point of view TW can. Many Thanks.

Hey MaxSuper,

Please excuse me for such a long delay with answer.

I think everything is in your mind and you do not have to appreciate yourself by how you look.
It is good to look well but it is not the most important thing in life.
I think you have many other capacities which you can develop and people will appreciate you.

Bro, how is going on your training and how passed tests for being a police officer?

Keep us updated bro

Hi there i really believe excercise can really help with depression, lots of high intensity cardio.Train your abs not with thousands of sit-ups all day long, or just put some sit-ups at the end of your workouts as a after thought, treat your abs as a major muscle group do a hour session every week and hit them heavy and hard dont bother with the old school sit-up its a "WAIST" of time(sorry).Do crunches with weight.Hanging leg raises (weighted). Try and use crunch machinces so you can put weight on to them.Dont forget your sides as well use weights for your upper obliques but you may not want to use weight on your lower sides as this can make you look wide and increase your waist line and get rid of that V-shape body.Sorry if i told you nothing new but hey!its all good.I suppose if you have a really problem with to much skin around your mid section then surgery may be a good move.Dont be asammed about anti-depressents and try and get off them when things may not be ideal wait untill things around you are set up and you feel physicaly good.

Hey MaxSuper,

We hope everything is all right with you. Please keep in touch with us.

Hey there Max...I'm new here, but I know how you feel. I was overweight as a child and lost it all in High-School. I gained alot of weight back while dealing with the realization that my brother, who was killed when I was 5 and he was 3, was never coming back....and I really didn't treat him good while he was here.

Prayer helped me...meditation....and accepting the fact that I can't change the past, but I can work towards the future.

For me, ab presses and leg lifts laying on a flat bench work like nothing else. I do 100 ab presses of 50-60 lbs at the end of every workout and then cardio for no less than 30 minutes. Also....stay away from the mirrors and scales for a little while and focus on the workout for 2 weeks very intensely and then observe the changes. I bet you will be pleasently surprised.

Good luck and God bless. I hope you get your certification!

-Stock

Hi everyone!

I am deeply sorry to be replying so late, but I have only just got my internet repaired, but I am really happy to see the huge response I have received from everybody on this forum :]

At present I’m avoiding too much insight into Bodybuilding and Models as seeing these ‘perfect’ images just gets me worked up and wish I looked like that, but I have to take into account these people make it their life to train, with or without gear, they get paid for what they’re doing and so can afford to look the best and train the best. So all I’m doing is just getting tips about how to train and eat well, and if in a while I think some things can’t be change, I may undergo surgery, but only as a last resort! Simply having my partner in my life helps me amazingly to be better so it’s always good to have support from there as well as from here.

As with the anti-depressants I’m continuing them until I finish my police training because I find myself most low when I’m on my own at home and because I’m unemployed I’m just simply going to the gym then staying at home till the next day when I train again. So when I’m fully police trained and working I’ll be confident enough to stand on my own two feet :] I’m at a stage now where I know there’s flaws with my image but I know it can be changed in my own time so I just work towards getting better. Some things are in my mind, hell Ronnie Coleman said once he is small in an interview- BUT HE’S HUGE!! So I’m aware that I’m being fuzzy but some things are faults with my image. However I managed to find a protein smoothy that I don’t get allergies from (rashes) so I’m consuming better amounts of protein and everyone is saying I look slimmer, so that makes me feel better too.

Being only 19 I have to admit I look better than most people in my town since they all drink heavily, smoke, over eat, don’t exercise and even take drugs. I see so many skinny people and I think they look great and I begin to want it since I think they are toned but when they take their shirt offs and stuff at the gym I see little ‘fat bellies’ that look horrible and they have small twiggy arms, it shows being big and muscled is much better to me than being boney and skinny :]

I have taken everything into account that has been said to me by Gunsimon0077 (who’s workout is effective), Trainwiser (who’s a good listener) and Stocktider (who has deeply emphasized my situation). I just want to thank you all again for your help and hope I haven’t wasted anyone’s time here. Depression is a long term thing but I know getting all your support, its making better progress for me. Thank you all!!!

Hey Bro,
We are like a family here, we are to help each other with advices from our life and experience.

BTW, what protein you have found to be useful when it comes to avoiding rashes?

Hi Jax, I purchased this protein from a local health food store, I was skeptical about it since it was low priced but it's proved very effective. Its called 'Whey Protein Smoothie' and is basically more of a smoothie rather than a milk shake. It's berry flavoured and I mix it with either Semi Skimmed milk or plain water, both taste identical. The pro here is that it also is a vitamin and mineral drink yet provides 30grms of protein at the same time. Some good stuff.

Hey man, I understand how you feel about the image thing. Just know like Trainwiser said, it is not just how you look, ther are more important things in life.

When I was 18 on my birthday, my brother told me to get some of my friends to get some gas cans and bring them to the place I worked at that time. I worked at a place where they had weddings, parties, etc. Well, I got 2 of my friends with gas cans filled with gas and we arrived to my work. (it is kind of in the country side) Anyway, we saw the biggest pile of brush we have ever seen in our lives. The city cut down all these huge trees and bushes and threw them all in a huge pile. Our job was to smother the pile with gas and then of course afterwards light it.

This is not a great story and I apoligize, but I have a point. When I was on that pile, my brother lit his lighter to light toilet paper wrapped aroung a rock to throw at the pile when we were done. When he lit the lighter, a section about 20 feet away from me flared up into flames instantly. When I saw that, I was like "Oh shit I got to get out now!"

I was eight feet in the air on a tree brach with 2 gas cans in my hands. I dropped those of course when I saw that, jumped off of the pile and I swear it was like an angel picked me up as I dove away from the pile as it all exploded. I was about 10 feet into the pile which the pile was about 30x25 feet.

Anyway, I got away from the pile alive by the grace of God I know. Well, I got 3rd degree burns on both of my legs (worst on my left because that was my leaping leg), and on my left arm. At first I did not know what really happened because it just sounded like I was in a plane crash or something.

After I got out of the hospitle for 2 weeks being in there I was pretty depressed. I played sports like tennis and football growing up and back then I did not think that I was ever going to play again. I had to wear these hot and uncomfortable compression sleaves on my legs and arm for a year. It was hot ass hell in the summer. Those things I thought looked really stupid and I thouight that a girl could never love me because of my scares.

It took several years for me to move on, but you know what? I started to lift weights like the way I always wanted to five days a week. My body got stronger and then I started to look better. Better than I ever did before. I did not look like a model or anything then but every change that I noticed motivated me more to meet more goals that I set up. Keep on doing what you are doing. Go be a police officer if you want to be. Mainly, follow your dreams. That is what I did and God will give you the desires of your heart. He will guide you.

I am now married to the most beautiful girl in the world and I am still making goals for myself. I want to add more muscle and I am going for it. I am sorry for the whole novel story I just typed, but it happened and I thought it would help.

God bless,

RAH

Hey RAH,

Thanks for sharing this great story. I really enjoyed reading it.
I think you did great thing by moving on and not complaining like "what I will do" and all those things.

Let God richly bless you and Max!