The google.

They call women the weaker sex. But she can tear the mightiest man apart with just 3 words: "Is it in?"

A man and his wife went to bed one night and the man was getting very frisky and asked his wife if she was in the mood. His wife answered, "Not tonight dear I have a headache."

The man replied, "Is that your final answer"? She said, "Yes."

...He said. "Ok, then, I'd like to phone a friend."

the idiots guide to making magic

1. Eating Mexican food is not the cause of gonorrhea.

2. There is no need for dice in role playing.

3. Intercourse doesn't happen on a highway.

4. If you engage in oral sex first, it's not called a head start.

5. If she says she's into "bondage," don't show her your financial portfolio.

6. You can lie down during a one-night stand.

7. When a woman talks about waiting for the "right time," she's not referring to a commercial break.

8. Only sleep with someone you love or can say you love without smirking.

9. Making out doesn't mean getting your money's worth.

10. Sex is like "The Club" - Accept no substitutes.

A banana and a vibrator on an adolescent’s desk:
Banana: - Is it the first time for you?
Vibrator: - No... why?
Banana: - I see you’re shaking.

A girl was wondering into the woods when suddenly she falls on her back. In the meantime, Pinocchio was strolling around there when suddenly he falls with his nose between the girls legs. The girl rushes to say to Pinocchio:
- Quick, Pinocchio, tell a lie...

There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick. He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed:
- Have you been doing anything unusual?
And he said: - No.
So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks. So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked:
- Have you been doing anything at all unusual?
And the guy said:
- Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.